I'm alive to see my grandson being born!

13/12/15 How cruel life can be and then here is the wonderful miracle of a new life, my grandson being born. Cancer, mastectomy, chemo, radiotherapy, reconstruction, bruising, bereavement, new nipple, cording, lymphedema, physiotherapy all become insignificant when I am holding my grandson in my arms. With all that some people still consider me to be brave and strong but really I am the luckiest woman alive and I appreciate the good and the happy times. Here's to 2016 being the start of a positive and happy future :) :)

All for a new nipple!!!! The guilt of surgery, where is that in the text book?

11/12/15 So I went in for my surgery and oh how little did I prepare myself for it. The level of pain and discomfort was not what I thought would happen. I kept saying "I'm having fat from here and put in here and a new nipple" and yes it sounds that simple in comparison to the last surgery but the bruising that came with it was so painful, I had 11 puncture holes where I had lipo taken from. But here I am just over a week later and I am back at work http://www.cancercare.org.uk/  and getting on with it. I have had so many emotions and especially the guilt of having chosen to have this surgery but part of my job is supporting others through their recovery and I have soon realised that for me and my recovery I needed to do this. I need to have scars that I can cope with and not be reminded that I am different by having just one breast. To me that meant I had to have Cancer cut out of me for me to carry on with my life. That is ok but to feel so different was hard for me to accept as the 'norm'.
I may look like Frankenstein under my clothes but you know what I am truly happy and proud of my scars now and as my husband say "you have a great rack" no-one has ever said that to me.