19/10/14 Here in hospital finally ready for my reconstruction. I've had an emotional weekend with everyone being with me. John having some big decisions to make about coming home or staying with his dad. Jenna being her amazing self, organising and getting me ready. She is wonderful. Elena is her preoccupied 11 yr old self gorgeous and lost in her own world building relationships and enjoying life. She makes me smile.
20/10/14 5.50am (the morning of my op) Just borrowed a charger off one of the nurses and can now let Flash know how much I love him. He is my rock never letting me down and making me feel safe and loved no matter how I look. This has all been made so much easier because I have him and all his love. So all is going to change in the next few hours. I know I am going to be in pain but others have done it and it's all bed worth it. I really hope my kids don't freak out. I've text Flash to ask Elena if she wants to come, i'm not sure it's a good idea today. It's really bizarre how much calmer I felt once I got here to hospital, I think it's been to waiting and the count down to it. My room is massive, I suppose for all the stuff I will need. My surgeon is lovely and I trust him so much with the op today. He has given me a lot of confidence remembering all the details of who I am. I'm a twin etc...... lovely lovely gentleman. There's a real calm in the air - clock ticking and empty rooms all around it's very quiet up this end of the ward. The nurses are lovely, the few I have met and I am feeling totally happy with everything. :) Nurse Chris is looking after me and she is great, i'm happy, she is excited for me and can't wait to see my new 'boob'. It all begins from here first checks done and gown and stockings coming eeeeeeeK!!!!!!!!!!!
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