Dad died!

22/05/13 On 7th Feb dad was taken into hospital and 6 weeks later we took him home to care for him and to fulfill his wish to die at home. 8 weeks later this happened and on 18th May at 5.25am peacefully and with Sue, Steve, Audra, Louise and myself at his bedside, with mum in her bedroom she was getting out of bed to come to us. I took hold of mum and told her dad had gone and she looked up and said "thank you".

My Eulogy.

My dad taught me to be the person I am today.

He gave me the qualities he had to be strong and to be a fighter. I remember when I told him I was sick he said "oh dear" he gave me a hug and told me you can get through this you will have us, we will support you.

He gave me peace in knowing each time I look at my brothers and sisters I will see him in them.

Steve- I see the confidence in you to "say it as it is"

Mick - I see the image of dad each time I look at you.

Keith - I see the lovely warm calmness in you that he had.

Audra - I see the fiery "don't mess with me" and the family values that meant so much to him.

And, Sue - I see those chicken legs, those long fingers and toes and the bobbly nose, You are him.

Dad gave us many memories and those family values that I hope I continue to instill in my children that no matter what path you take no matter what decisions you make I will always be there for you without judging yolu and with my unconditional love, just like my dad had for me.

At this point I would like to say some thank you's, whenever anyone came to dad he would always say thank you so on behalf of the family we would like to express our heartfelt gratitude to Dr Harris, the district nurses, hospice at home and to all the carers - especially to Ray & 'our' Ann who continued to be there for dad and will continue to help us all care for our amazing, wonderful, beautiful mum.     Thank You.

02/07/13 All was good for dads send off and when we scattered his ashes on his birthday we celebrated and laughed lots all together again. It was sad saying bye to Keith but made easier knoweing I will be seeing him again soon in Australia for my recovery.
So we are on countdown to the wedding only 8 weeks now. I took mum and Sue to see my dress and they both cried. It's going to be a great day celebrating our future together, however long that will be!
I opened up to Sue and told her I am scared of the future and that the time I have is so precious. Thoughts go through my head about the 'what if's' but I won't let them take over my positivity and my fight.
I have just been interviewed again for another news paper and it got me thinking again. There is a 50/50 chance of it coming back and it feels like it's a ticking time bomb, and will it be the 50 that comes back? I've been feeling really tired again lately but that might be the fact that it's all coming to an end and with the stress of dad going everything might just be catching up on me?????